leaving

i rose from my bed this morning. i was about to reach over and grab my laptop, but stopped myself. i've had a habit lately of this being the very first thing i do every single day - my eyes are open, and so that must mean that i must get on my computer.

but today...i didn't. i looked down at my arm, and in the rising light of a 5:30 morning it didn't feel like mine and i forced it back down as i fell back on to my sheets.

after shaving my head the night before, my bristled scalp remained the only thing actually tying me metaphysically down.

"our universe may have started not with a big bang but with a big bounce - an implosion that triggered an explosion, all driven by exotic quantum-gravitational effects."